Okay, so for the short story I had to write for my Honors English class had to be in first person to show the person’s thoughts. While at first I struggled a lot with figuring out what the conflict would be, I finally came to it when I was listening, of course, to my iPod. I feel this is a strong topic for me because I’ve had a few members in my family who have dealt with cutting themself. So, this is a very strong topic for me, and I’m just glad my teacher said it was good! I went with a minimalistic way of writing because I felt that captured the moment the best. I’m posting a little excerpt for you guys to read, I hope you like it!
My vibrant blue eyes seem to dull. My blond hair wilts before my eyes. My “beautiful” face deforms to the monster I am. The monster no one else sees but me.
I am not pretty.
I am not loved.
I am not known.
My parents constantly fight, I’m constantly being picked on, and I’m never chosen over that one girl with all the looks.
No, you can’t leave!
I’m taking the kids!
No, you’re not!
Don’t you touch me!
I’m sorry.
I love you.
It’s always the same. They fight over a menial thing. We leave. We come back. All is good until one finds some error in the other. Never is it about me they say. But, it’s always my fault they fight, in my eyes anyway. I’m the one who told Mom about Daddy’s little secret.
Nevertheless of any doubt my mind holds, I know. I know who my new best friend is about to be. We were about to become acquainted fairly quickly. It’s sad that the friendship had to occur and end so quickly, though.
Faintly, my hand grabs the blade.
Then, doubt sets in again.
I wonder if it will hurt. I wonder if anyone will cry. I wonder if anyone will find me.
What will my funeral be like? Will anyone even show for it? Or will my parents just cremate me and not even deal with the service?
©Kaylor Montgomery 2010, All Rights Reserved. No redistribution allowed unless asked first.
aravindh cee Said:
on April 29, 2011 at 9:38 am
hello! Loved the excerpt….I really think it captured the essence of sorrow and self-doubt, and I felt I could really connect with it. keep up the good work